Free Will On: A Chat Show, Episode Two

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Pen: Goot eveningk. I am Pay-Nay-Lope Zeh Seem an' zeesh ees Free Wheel Awn weeth Pay-Nay-Lope Zeh Seem. So what do you think? Should I open with that?

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Ripp: What accent is that supposed to be?

Pen: Oh, I don't know. General Eastern European. I'm trying to set a mood here.

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Phoenix: That doesn't sound very politically correct.

Pen: Says a man who enjoys the fruits of a complex and oppressive caste system.

Phoenix: (gasping) I beg your-

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Ripp: I don't see what our socioeconomic hierarchy has to do with you racially othering the good people of Eastern Europe.

Pen: Look, I'm trying to host a show here and you two chuckleheads aren't being very supportive of my artistic vision. I didn't get half of this crap from the Tipper Gore Sim.

Camera Man: And we're live in five, four, three, two...

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Pen: Good evening, I am Penelope the Sim and this is the Special Halloween Edition of Free Will On with your hostess, Penelope the Sim. I am joined here by my guests, Phoenix Goth and Agrippa Dreamer on location at the House of Fallen Trees.

Phoenix: (jumping up) What the hell was that?

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Pen: (groans) This is live network television. Please don't swear.

Phoenix: An orb! I think I saw an orb!

Ripp: Dirk was right. We can never take you anywhere.

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Pen: (hops off chair, excited) An orb? Really? Where did it go?

Phoenix: I dunno.

Ripp: Umm Pen, it's hovering right next to you.

Pen: Hunh?

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Phoenix: Well, I'll be damned. That's not normal, is it?

Pen: Normal, schmormal, this is television gold! A close encounter of the ghostly kind. Are you getting all of this?

Ripp: It's a tennis ball.

Phoenix: A haunted tennis ball. (reaches)

Pen: DON'T TOUCH IT!

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Phoenix: Hm. Squishy.

Ripp: Anyone up for mojitos?

Pen: How can you think about mojitos at a time like this?

Ripp: Just watch me.

Phoenix: (lets go of ball)

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Ripp: (skipping backwards) It's trying to sniff my crotch!

Phoenix: Could be worse.

Ripp: (swats at ball and runs to bar)

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Phoenix: I think this might be the most half-assed haunting I have ever seen.

Pen: AGAIN with the swearing!

Phoenix: Well it is.

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Ripp: For dead people, they sure do keep a well-stocked bar.

Pen: I don't think that we should be drinking the murder house gin.

Ripp: Waste not, endure a poorly planned and executed interview sober not.

Pen: You're right. Hand me a drink.

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Phoenix: Can I get it for you?

Pen: Er, thanks but I'm perfectly capable of...

Phoenix: (blocks path)

Pen: (tries to reach around)

Phoenix: (doesn't budge)

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Pen: Oh! Well, I...

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Ripp: And this has been Free Will On with Penelope the Sim. Join her again next week when she gets stuck in a room with Enoch Goth and Madeline Burb. Happy Halloween, Pleasantview!

10 comments:

  1. Teeheehee, a haunted tennis ball :)

    Mojitos? God, Ripp is delightfully random! He just gained a ton of points in my books :)

    I just can't get over the hotness of Phoenix. Ripp's not too bad either. I would have never guessed that Cassandra Goth was capable of making such good-looking children.

    Enoch and Madeline? That should be interesting... :D

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  2. Ah, well if the hotness of Phoenix interests you, then you won't be disappointed by Chapter 64.

    It ain't really a party unless it's an Enoch party.

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  3. PHOENIX!!! It's like Egelric and Wyn had a baby, and that baby was named HOT! And you got to kiss him!

    What is up with the haunted tennis ball? I don't have haunted tennis balls in my game. (Which is fine with me.)

    These things are so much random fun. Pay-nay-lope rhymes with Sa-lope!

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  4. It's so weird how much he looks like Wyn and Egelric. His parents were both Maxis sims, neither of which looked anything like Egelric or Wyn. In fact, in my former incarnation of Pleasantview, my Cassandra Goth had ten children. None of them looked a thing like Phoenix. He's a total one-off.

    Oh man, what a silly set of interactions for three sims to have. Pen da Sim was spewing floating hearts left and right for both brothers. Phoenix was the only one that allowed her romantic advances (probably because he's divorced- though still wearing his wedding ring). Phoenix came on kinda strong though. Pen shut him down a few times. He then proceeded to do much juggling, for which Ripp congratulated him repeatedly.

    The haunted tennis ball is actually just a game of hackey sack. The three of them couldn't seem to get enough of that. I interrupted their games several times so that they would do other things.

    *facepalm* You know, after I got out of the chat with you guys that night, the first thing that my boyfriend said to me was, "Penelope Cruz is really hot." not knowing what we had been discussing. He had seen the same magazine spread that Mr. Lothere thought was "Salope Cruz".

    So then I told my boyfriend about it, bringing his knowledge of the French language up to three words:

    1) Bonjour
    2) Nain de Jardin (technically three words)
    3) Salope

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  5. He's almost got a whole phrase's worth there. "Bonjour, salope. Tu veux voir mon nain de jardin?"

    *makes penis joke on Pen's own blog*

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  6. I love these things, they're so random!

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  7. hehe I'm glad that you're enjoying these.

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  8. This is hysterical! I love it! I was watching one of those ghost hunter shows the other day and they are started screaming and hooting about orbs. Had no idea what an 'orb' was supposed to be. Still don't know but I'm guessing it's in some way important.

    Keep doing these - love them!!!

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  9. *hehehe* Glad you're liking these, Beth! From what can tell, an orb is a floaty ball of light that appears where there is a haunting. Or in this case, a floaty tennis ball that appears where there is a haunting.

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